He was her first virgin, and he waited to do it in a bed.
Sure, sometimes it’s better not to just come right out and say it, for instance “the unicorns” represent “the writing” and that “the unicorns” are the perfect symbol of “the writing’s magical, elusive, cunning, and enchanted nature.”
Texas gets a bad rap because it's filled with assholes, but really if you take any area the size of Texas anywhere it will be filled with assholes, because that's what people are.
The night before you were born, your mother and I watched Knocked Up downstairs in the family room.
Rocky Horror Picture Show is probably the biggest piece of bullshit I've ever seen pass as a movie. Besides the fact that it looks like it had the budget of about twelve dollars, there is no plot,
The two of them are down on the riverbank, idling; their calico van sits arch-above.
In the fall of Helga Vierksen’s death, I was seven years old.
1) Technically, everything remains but the stereo, circa 1998, a sound system so old it couldn't play CD's for more than an hour without overheating into unbearable skips...
Of course, I think that Mark Twain is true. I think that Samuel Clemens is the lie. Only a dishonest person wants you to know that a story they are telling "really happened."
Perks of Being a Wallflower is the very beautiful, slightly tragic, endearing story of diffident, introverted Charlie (Logan Lerman) and his first year of high school as he’s taken under the wings
Kathy Acker was sick of shaving her legs. Every time she shaved them she cut herself. It didn’t matter if the blade was dull or sharp. Inevitably the blade would steal pieces of her knee.
You were a horse yesterday; what happened? I rode you places under the hot sun. You fought off flies with your tail and we galloped knee deep through rivers. When apples fell off the tree and we
Hello, Sarah, your skin’s perspiring. Nervous? Your heart rate just jumped to 153 beats per minute and your eyes dilated by two millimeters. By the way, I like what you’ve done with your hair: the
An interview with Mark Jude Poirier
Thrift stores are full of possibility and sadness, which makes them perfect settings for fiction, in my opinion.
I still remember how he'd pour, like a ritual, like he still does to this day when he mixes himself a Beam & Pepsi at the end of the day.
I literally can’t even warn you about what it feels like to see Sinister, other than that it makes you feel like you’re watching a real murder. At the beginning of the film it had the makings of a
DREAM
Our legs are stilts. Beyond our ankles
are the blunt ends of crutches. Our feet
are missing. But our hands are fine,
Boy says. There’s a rope suspended
between our bodies. Our
He had a broad scar that ran over the back of his kneecap. The skin was all shiny and soft, like white bread packaged in Saran Wrap.
Here’s a story. One night in the tedious plains of Colorado, Abraham Lincoln drove his Model T into an embankment...
A massive plaster moon rotates above the rooftop bar, casting a milky glow over my fellow patrons. One by one their orders are placed. A vanilla bean porter with toasted nut highlights. A
This was the movie that I had been most excited for this summer. I’m most likely Zach Galifianakis’ biggest fan, and I’m not that far off from being Will Ferrell’s either. But, as many hilarious
One girl watches the boys make a bomb of birds
a split bowl of suns dissolving a table
An excited murmur came to life when the audience was informed of the PhD in Biogenetics, the B.S. in Mechanical Engineering, and then the sweet icing: the minor in English.
For this edition of the Non-Reader Spotlight, I’m thrilled to be talking about reading and not reading with Mary Hamilton.
Spend enough time on Twitter and you will eventually discover there is within it an odd, alternate world of very funny, 140-character prankster surrealists. A shortcut to discovering them: Go to
FUTURE 45
There was a pile of sticks on the edge of the world. In it, numerous things of interest were living. One was a lawyer who enjoyed eating fried chicken at unusually early times
