If I leave rambling, incoherent apologies on your voicemail at four in the morning, is it still impressive that I’ve quit drinking?

Season 6, season finale: Hank Moody attends AWP. Moral tragedy ensues.

I awoke in a forest of yellow
trees. When the air turned cold
they erased themselves.

I’m hoarse and feverish. We sing in the streets, “Feelin’ good was good enough for me, hee hee,” but then the breakfast booth only has two seats.

48 hours after his mysterious disappearance Lowe uploaded the first of many filter-less photographs to come to his, once deactivated and now reactivated, Instagram account. 

[Previously:  Part 10  ::  Part 9  ::  Part 8  ::  Part 7  ::  Part 6  ::  Part 5  ::  Part 4  ::  Part 3  ::  Part 2  ::  Part 1]

Last time on...

I wear a velvet piece to the therapist’s office and she asks me to close my eyes. We agree to experience an illusion of me dancing...

I do not leave
the houses I’ve built, I carry the nails and raise

the walls around me

But this whole thing is wrong. Your hair is uneven around the edges where you cut it this morning. 

She wore a gold necklace that read “Boy Toy” and she stroked it lustily as she spoke. It was the 80s and everyone’s taste sucked. 

Black Phillip says monogamy means convincing somebody they like being controlled.

I was sitting at the edge of her mattress. We barely looked at each other. She would have been in Chemistry if we hadn’t skipped third period. I would have been in English II.

I can’t stop watching teenage boys eat shit at the skate park.
It gives me real pleasure.

Stay in a hell I can't reach you from.

Your fingers fumble with the seatbelt’s metal latch. You say you don’t feel safe. That safety is a bigger lie than Jesus.

You breathe and scream so deep, underwater it sounds like song. 

Someone else is waiting by the door. I’m brushing dust off my jacket getting over to her, but really looking at my hand, which hasn’t stopped shaking in the past minute. I think I’m excited.

An excerpt from WASTE: a novel

Elvira Moon loved bowling. For four straight years, her team, the Blooming Broads, dominated the women’s league, decimating all opponents until Big Tina quit to start her own team, the South Side Splitters, with that bitch Claudia from Couscous or whatever country she’d arrived from in a banana crate. 

[Previously on... Part 5 :: Part 4 :: Part 3 :: Part 2 :: Part 1]

Last time the notorious cats have tricked dogkind who sent its army on a wild goose chase to the cat's old planet, Cot neep,

She gave my dog lighter fluid.

She said my dog didn’t drink it because she put it there.

The dog drank it because it was an accident.

A wedding is coming
up, and it’s mine

Whenever Amanda and I get into a fight she calls me poor. She tells me that, in my country, they sell nappy-headed dark skin girls like me for 20 silver coins and a healthy goat. 

½ cup (one stick) of unsalted butter (higher quality butter = better tasting cannabutter)

¼ ounce of weed, VERY finely ground

I noticed a tall man in front of me with a long umbrella hanging from his arm. He was watching the priest and listening. When we began the preparations for communion, the tall man threw himself onto his knees. 

I never call ahead to say I'm in town and on the way over because the front door is always unlocked. 

Look at those fucking crows, Mona said.  She and Dan and I were sitting on our porch, drinking vodka tonics and staring at the view, which was pretty good with the sun going down and the corn in the field between our two houses almost ripe and ready to harvest.