A Good Day
Bullet hole in the back of the head,
I open your mouth to look through the wound
like a telescope It’s all so clear now:
Yes, the fog was crawling up the hill
and a mossy rabbit jumped
across the stream, into the field.
Yes, the lightning was purple before the thunder
crumpled in my ears,
brightening the room,
veins in the air.
Yes, your death was just a coldness against my hands as I
held you up by the shoulders.
And yes, it really is quite sad,
you thought you were going to have such a good day.
I think lots of things about me have grown larger,
mainly my body, my unkempt figure,
the lemony murmur at the back of my neck,
and the cavities of my bones, scraped hollow,
are now pitch dark.
It bleats in fear–
the meat of me, failing.
You’ve heard of flightless fish that get
flung out of the water for wanting something special;
you’ve seen the screwdriver hit the first eye,
burgundy blood reshaping the tide,
watched tactless hands re-stab to puncture
the brain housed somewhere between
He let it squirm and bleed and flap it’s rear-wing,
watched it sputter–moving like it didn’t want to die.
If only he had hit it on its side,
been more deliberate,
he would have killed the fish,
the flame would have bucked eastward,
I would have stayed silent as I watched him aim
at the small stolen thing near his feet.
I find myself searching for a formless future
only to look back at myself and find my present
mutilated by small bruises,
hornets in rose bushes–like the one that stung my Auntie
who just did not know simple,
careless things like
which side of the scythe reaps the grass,
which faucet provides warm water.
you saw the scales in his teeth,
the blood in the sand,
What’s not obvious?
We ate bluefish for dinner.
Months later you remember looking at him through
green murk, you still feel it on the skin inside your skin.
4 pm light tea stained on the tusk-white walls
cut into window squares, pale forehead nearing orange.
Palm pressed hard to get a smile, your skin caved in,
a sunken stomach full of freshwater pearls [barnacle beauty
I thought you wanted to take me
to the river but I was wrong
that’s okay I’ll get over it one day.