The Orbiter
Sarah Kasbeer
When I asked years later if you had a sex addiction and you said, No, do you? I hesitated before responding no, because I was thinking, Only to you.
When I asked years later if you had a sex addiction and you said, No, do you? I hesitated before responding no, because I was thinking, Only to you.
Snapchat filter. Left.
but you know there is a Truth Moment coming, and sure enough the next morning he says hey and you say hey and he says sorry about last night
You’re probably thinking these things happened a very long time ago, but as a matter of fact it was just yesterday, and yet somehow we are all old and married with children now, even the former supermodel
He doesn’t seem to think I’m a handful. I can tell by his texts.
In the train carriage, we’re hot in our furs, brooding and half-drunk.
The other half was the memories of the end. The time Teddy had threatened to burn the only copy of my novel.
He stole my Tupperware, the largest one in a glass Pyrex set.
Sophie had recently gone through a break up. I don’t remember her ex's name. I do remember the striking legibility of the word VIOLENCE.
My fantasy of Lockwood started to deflate like a balloon with a tiny hole.
/pəˈzeʃ.ən/
One morning I woke up with my right scapula in my mouth. You would think that is physically impossible, but in the case of demonic possessions it is actually more normal than not.
I tolerated Marcus and Haley because I knew their drill. Marcus would pick me up with drugs coursing through his system
I reminded myself that I spent just as many lonely afternoons in the State Library of Victoria with a pile of international Vogues as I did at a Goodwill in the Valley.
I was sobbing too loud for the men’s room and I was in no shape to explain myself so I settled on the supply closet next to it. After a couple minutes of moping I got a BBM (we had to have Blackberries then, for whatever reason) from Jarrett. “Were fuck are you bro?”
A year wrapped in a day, a teardrop at the climax of every way that wounded, furthering the wounds.
That was the world then…
That was the world then….bawdy cars and tawdry thoughts and rundown wannabe skyscrapers brownie baked by the sun that just looked cheap against the horizon and everybody
I hold myself in the plank position. The little dog sits on the rug watching. It’s a very expensive rug. She’s not supposed to be here. He’s up on the purple couch and I do not know what he is
I was zipped up to my nose in a sleeping bag, inhaling moist breath mingled with olfactory ghosts of campfires and wild sex past.
We paid the cover charge and stood among the young homosexuals of Columbus.
I never wanted to run this ship. Frankly, I’d rather spend my time writing.
Hello,
the worst thing about stopping Ambien was that I never did it with anybody else.
I did it alone in my bathtub.
I did it alone, smoking in the water, & when it kicked in I’d let the
1.
Remember when you would sit on the floor of my lavender painted room when I was 15 and you were 21? You’d twirl a dreadlock around your finger looking up at the wall of Teen People Magazine
a monstera I brought as a housewarming gift; bookcases betraying a brilliant, associative mind—the LOTR trilogy, a chess board, tomes on capitalism and ecology, The Power Broker, an anthology of gay poetry, more Caro books on LBJ, a poetry book I’d gifted atop the dusty shelves
I worried I had magically bloated between 9 a.m. and lunch time, even though I’d only eaten the prescribed six saltine crackers.
I couldn't fully recall the Simpsons episode in which Marge buys a near-identical pink Chanel dress.
Love is like a museum. You have to look around, experience things, and then leave.
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“Legs Get Led Astray is a scorching hot glitter box full of youthful despair and dark delight.”
—Cheryl Strayed, author of WILD