When reciting the Ten Plagues in Hebrew, we customarily dip our knives into our wine glass for each plague and set a drop of wine on our dinner plate.

Showboat said he'd like to take me out sometime. I asked why.

“Because I think you’re attractive, and so we can hang out somewhere other than the coffee trailer,” he said.

It was October, ten

One morning on McSweeney’s there was an announcement about a new literary festival in Philadelphia organized by Neal Pollack. It was going to be called the 215 Festival (named after the city’s area code) and would feature readings by Dave and Zadie and Matthew Klam and Neal, as well as other young, McSweeney’s type writers.

Do we keep our husbands’ secrets,
or distribute them like sweets 
amongst ourselves?

I stand just a couple inches from the mirror in my grandma’s guest bathroom at her house in New Mexico, my breath fogging up the glass. As I brush my teeth, I give myself the once over and tug at the

For, indeed, posole shows you he can cook. He fancies an air of the quixotic.

He must be a feminist.

This isn’t the first time someone I considered a friend has confessed their love for me.

I am supposed to call myself a survivor, but honestly I don’t think surviving is what I’ve been doing.

Okay guys today I'm going to be making you one of my favorite dishes from childhood with a couple of my own little twists. My mom used to make this all the time and I just love it. It's suuuper

While I sucked my husband’s penis he gaped at the sky, to which he exclaimed, “That’s the most orange orange I have ever seen!” 

1. A well to do woman hosts an orgy that gets gate crashed by a vanilla couple (I just want to be included).
2. A boy is seduced by his ex-girlfriend’s hot mom on the Fourth of July (I’m facing my fear of MILFs).

She wears those sharp button downs, tucked into pants with riding boots, and a blunt bob. Sometimes, even, a tie. Knotting, unknotting, re-knotting in the smudged dorm mirror, how many tries does it take to get right?

The first fries I had when I was a kid weren’t from McDonald’s but from The Odeon.

The first man is the only one that kills you.

—COLETTE, La Naissance du Jour

Who is Angel? Who am I.

Have you ever loved a mirror?

Laughed, on suicide watch, until Kool-Aid spilled

What most people don’t know is that most of your town butchers are on some kind of pill, powder, or liquid, to get them through the day. 

I

am the only man to come to Las Vegas w/an ex-gf and not fuck her—arriving two nights early on my own to hike up in

Everyone worries about mind control.

The summer she was without anyone

and I had just left the other girl

in Jersey City,

Molly and I kissed at her house. We were adults

who lived with our parents. She seemed like

He was too poor to erect an everlasting monument in her likeness, all he could afford were words.  

I’m trying to do this story to get Kim’s feelings out there, but there seems to be a lot of secrecy and rumors about her death as if people are ashamed of how she died instead of why she died…

That was my youth: I developed a sickness, a ruinous crush on the man at the filling station

We chased the tail laid before us. Scratching and sniffing our way to pain. We took turns leaving consciousness for a few seconds.

I was stationed in Osh, a forty minute flight south of the capital. I had

a decent sized apartment

1. A bottle of orange wine – half a packet of cigarettes.

2. You caught at the bar the space so crowded that people were practically caught under your armpits – grinning nervously, two pina coladas in hand.

3. A kitchen dance – or two.

4. Luther Vandross.

Gone, like T9 texting, is the once exciting novelty of being important, popular, scandalous