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Irrational Man photo
September 15, 2015 | movie reviews

Irrational Man

Sean Kilpatrick

Only someone whose amazing art can no longer hide them from the petty philanthropy hopefully juxtaposing the asinine incest of their crimes would issue such a dollar bill of a sentence. 

Faults / Cheap Thrills / The Shield / The Corndog Man photo
September 4, 2015 | movie reviews

Faults / Cheap Thrills / The Shield / The Corndog Man

Sean Kilpatrick

Being human is about: what’s unobtainable today? 

The End of the Tour photo
August 13, 2015 | movie reviews

The End of the Tour

Sean Kilpatrick

To recover from the grand wizard of empathy’s commencement speech, I have since camped at grocery stores, when I can afford them, awaiting the flotation device of my college degree’s supposed intellectual extenuation of the human gridlock.

Terminator Genisys / Jurassic World photo
July 28, 2015 | movie reviews

Terminator Genisys / Jurassic World

Sean Kilpatrick

Hopefully, I’ve ingested enough synthetic flavor to stop my heart real early. Or to maintain tinnitus for the length of a harassing phone call. If not, the only responsibility of the adult is to be their own Kevorkian.

Montage of Heck / The Wolfpack / Amy  photo
July 22, 2015 | movie reviews

Montage of Heck / The Wolfpack / Amy 

Sean Kilpatrick

Then the world boned its youth one worse. Even if you weren’t participating, they made not giving a fuck popular. 

The Tribe photo
June 18, 2015 | movie reviews

The Tribe

Sean Kilpatrick

Cinetopia is a Detroit film festival for fresh retirees on a cinematic tour bus who belch knowingly whenever they mistake their hunched way into an obscene masterpiece. 

Ex Machina / Captain Phillips photo
June 16, 2015 | movie reviews

Ex Machina / Captain Phillips

Sean Kilpatrick

Some animals devour their young to cease lactation so they can fuck more often. People tripped over the invention of a conscience for no other happenstance than to keep our numbers plump.

The Reconstruction of William Zero / Lost River / Buzzard photo
June 5, 2015 | movie reviews

The Reconstruction of William Zero / Lost River / Buzzard

Sean Kilpatrick

Gosling has an understanding beyond the Franco. There’s a certain silence to his pose. I dig his tone, even if he’s sexy.

Mad Max Fury Road / Tender Napalm / Zeitgeist Theatre photo
May 22, 2015 | movie reviews

Mad Max Fury Road / Tender Napalm / Zeitgeist Theatre

Sean Kilpatrick

Not belonging feels more and more like banging a rough cookie on the counter these days. I would take pride in my crumbs, if I knew how. It’s good to be alive like a delinquent spaz.

It Follows photo
April 11, 2015 | movie reviews

It Follows

Sean Kilpatrick

PS – This film deserves its every cult and to be ranked even beyond into the commonly over-valued status of a classic

Top Five photo
March 25, 2015 | movie reviews

Top Five

Sean Kilpatrick

Seinfeld near tits is an innovative sight. A billionaire can only be cropped next to libidinous events with CGI. It appears comedians struggle to retrieve their teeth back from fame. 

Starred Up photo
March 20, 2015 | movie reviews

Starred Up

Sean Kilpatrick

I think Hemingway killed the subordinate clause because it looked at him slantward from the shelled nobility of an era that deserved Victorianism.

American Sniper photo
February 11, 2015 | movie reviews

American Sniper

Sean Kilpatrick

I’m troubled to notice odd similarities between my nihilism and the right wing. 

The Imitation Game / Foxcatcher photo
January 31, 2015 | movie reviews

The Imitation Game / Foxcatcher

Sean Kilpatrick

Between The Social Network and The Imitation Game, we can decipher precisely how our genitals should disrobe us. I, for one, will be relieved to wave them uploaded straight under Darwin’s

Inherent Vice photo
January 27, 2015 | movie reviews

Inherent Vice

Sean Kilpatrick

I only look you in the eyes if I’m sure the condom’s on.

I Love You, Apple, I Love You, Orange photo
January 9, 2015 | movie reviews

I Love You, Apple, I Love You, Orange

Sean Kilpatrick

This is the first magic realist mumblecore psychological love story thriller shot over eight years of Claymation. 

Polyester in Odorama / The Room with Tommy Wiseau in person photo
December 31, 2014 | movie reviews

Polyester in Odorama / The Room with Tommy Wiseau in person

Sean Kilpatrick

and it is always okay to be cruel in the arts, whether people like him are in on it or not, because who cares, internet (hey internet, how do I take a selfie of my fucking concern for others?)

The Interview photo
December 25, 2014 | movie reviews

The Interview

Sean Kilpatrick

 Shucks, you know the only racism worth a damn comes from poverty. I like Franco when he’s silly.

Ninja Turtles / Interstellar / Guardians of the Galaxy / Birdman photo
December 23, 2014 | movie reviews

Ninja Turtles / Interstellar / Guardians of the Galaxy / Birdman

Sean Kilpatrick

PS. I was part of an email the studio campaign in the early 2000s to openly mock the idea of a Dawn of the Dead remake, before remakes were a condition.

Whiplash photo
November 27, 2014 | movie reviews

Whiplash

Sean Kilpatrick

Is Chekov why I’m so sad? I’ll give you twenty bucks for a plot in literature that acknowledges his talent, but ignores him slightly more.

Gone Girl photo
November 7, 2014 | movie reviews

Gone Girl

Sean Kilpatrick

A relationship’s complacency can only end atop the stripped sinew of an erect Doogie Howser. We’re not gonna hide at being perfect.

Tusk photo
October 14, 2014 | movie reviews

Tusk

Sean Kilpatrick

Sometimes you have to say fuck it and cry masterpiece.

Life before Boyhood photo
October 10, 2014 | movie reviews

Life before Boyhood

Victor Freeze

I’m 23-years-old going through a mid-life crisis. Well, not quite mid-life considering I’m convinced I have less than seven years left to live. 

Tom Sizemore and the Heat Death of the Universe photo
October 9, 2014 | movie reviews

Tom Sizemore and the Heat Death of the Universe

Sean Kilpatrick

People want their maniacs explained. But there is no autopsy deft enough to expose how sensually disfigured a mind can get.

Sin City: A Dame to Kill For photo
September 16, 2014 | movie reviews

Sin City: A Dame to Kill For

Sean Kilpatrick

Please go read the reviews for this movie on The Onion, the pissant caboodle that now passes for Roger Ebert.com, and Ain’t It Cool News, yeah, them too, for some reason.

Recent Books

Nudes

Elle Nash

“Transgressive and immediate: you feel these stories shoot through and wrap around you.” 

             - Kyle F. Williams, Full Stop Magazine

 

Worsted

Garielle Lutz

“Lutz’s work is a marvel of the possibilities of language.  Each of her sentences is an intricately crafted thing, deeply complex yet crystalline in its clarity . . . her command of each and every word remains supreme.” --Mira Braneck, The Paris Review Daily

"Worsted sees the undeniable unicorn of the American sentence sprout pearlescent, fractally chiseled wings and take flight like Pegasus over the letters landscape."  --Big Bruiser Dope Boy

 

Her Lesser Work

Elizabeth Ellen

"Her Lesser Work is far and away my favorite of your books, and 'G.O.A.T' in particular is a blast of brilliance."

     -Garielle Lutz

"Um, is 'Plant Hospital' both the hottest story and the hottest piece of literary gossip of the decade?!"

     -Rebecca van Laer