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Showing results for Commercial Fiction

Baby Hitler and the Slow Talking Man photo
January 9, 2016 | Commercial Fiction

Baby Hitler and the Slow Talking Man

Dave Housley

Baby Hitler was getting bored. Mother had been away longer than usual. He had already played with the rattle and looked at the picture book and eaten some cheese and now he was ready for Mother to

Baby Hitler and the Man with the Glowing Hair photo
December 19, 2015 | Commercial Fiction, Fiction

Baby Hitler and the Man with the Glowing Hair

Dave Housley

Baby Hitler giggles and pulls another leg off the spider. Just three legs this time. He pulled them all off the last one and pushed it into the corner and it just sat there until finally Baby

Baby Hitler and the Man from the Republican Primary photo
December 12, 2015 | Commercial Fiction, Fiction

Baby Hitler and the Man from the Republican Primary

Dave Housley

Baby Hitler woke up angry. He sat up. They would be coming for him again. Who, he did not know. A kung fu master? A presidential candidate from the future? Last week a woman in a strange yellow

Persil photo
May 2, 2015 | Commercial Fiction

Persil

Dave Housley

The Professional felt the rush of consciousness, the quick awakening that could only mean another person with questions. Another intransigent stain on a garment. He had come to think of it as a

State Farm photo
March 28, 2015 | Commercial Fiction

State Farm

Dave Housley

Jake from State Farm hangs up the phone and hustles to the bathroom.

Super Bowl (2013) photo
February 2, 2014 | Commercial Fiction

Super Bowl (2013)

Dave Housley

Last year, we ran a series of "Commercial Fiction"s by Dave Housley, which were collected into a book. One such piece in the series was inspired not just by a single commercial but by a collection

Taco Bell photo
May 18, 2013 | Commercial Fiction

Taco Bell

Dave Housley

A new email dings into his box and Miller cringes. Somehow he knows it’s from her, something about the ding – it is insistent, urgent, as sure as a poke in the back of the neck. This will be

Canada Dry photo
March 23, 2013 | Commercial Fiction

Canada Dry

Dave Housley

Excerpt from Centers for Disease Control: Obesity in Central Florida, February 2019.

Wes Urban, 32 years of age, 298 lbs.

We weren’t always like this. How fat we are is what I mean. Most of

Budwesier photo
February 23, 2013 | Commercial Fiction

Budwesier

Dave Housley

The man woke up and walked to the bathroom. He relieved his bladder and looked at himself in the mirror. He looked at the clock. 6:25. He could either go back to sleep or head down to the basement

McDonald's photo
February 16, 2013 | Commercial Fiction

McDonald's

Dave Housley

We pull into the campground and it’s just like I imagined it would be: chaparral scrub receding to oaks and firs as we move up into the mountains on a gently winding road. You’d never know we’re

Super Bowl photo
February 4, 2013 | Commercial Fiction

Super Bowl

Dave Housley

Guildenstern flips the coin and holds it out for Rosencrantz to see.

“Heads,” Rosencrantz says. “Again heads.” He turns around. “So we were sent for?”

Guildenstern flips the coin. “I hear

Range Rover photo
February 2, 2013 | Commercial Fiction

Range Rover

Dave Housley

Captain’s Log: Captain Richard L. Hiltonshire, HMS Evoque, North Carolina Coast. May 12, 1801

The Coast is in sight. America, I pray, although with all that has gone astray on this cursed

Toyota photo
January 26, 2013 | Commercial Fiction

Toyota

Dave Housley

Burns looks out toward the road. He puts a hand up to the glass and shakes his head. “I can’t believe this,” he says, his breath fogging the double-paned, oversized bay windows. “You’re not going

Lexus photo
December 25, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Lexus

Dave Housley

Cynthia wakes to coffee smell and the sounds of William getting breakfast ready for the kids. She closes her eyes and for a moment, it is as if everything is normal. Like last Christmas, the one

Kentucky Fried Chicken photo
December 9, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Kentucky Fried Chicken

Dave Housley

You are not the kind of guy who would be at a place like this at this time in the evening. But here you are, and you cannot say the terrain is entirely unfamiliar. You are at a party, talking to a

Intuit GoPayment photo
December 2, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Intuit GoPayment

Dave Housley

 

Derek barely slows down at intersections. Not anymore. Not since we got that card reader and “set out toward the sun.”

Right now, we’re somewhere in Virginia or North Carolina, barreling

Subway photo
November 18, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Subway

Dave Housley

The first thing was, everybody’s voices changed. Not changed deeper, like puberty. This was changing back: they went high, squeaky, like we were seven years old again. This is right after we all

Miller Lite photo
November 4, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Miller Lite

Dave Housley

We were taking shots at the bar before the bar, pre-gaming, game-facing. We did a round of jaeger bombs and Fixer knocked some dap and went outside for a smoke.

Viagra photo
October 28, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Viagra

Dave Housley

The real cowboy wears a fishing cap and one of those vests you associate with photographers, only his isn't stuffed with film or lenses or malaria pills so much as his cigarettes and a lighter,

Direct TV photo
October 21, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Direct TV

Dave Housley

Here is what I know. They wear tights. Their wings are thin flapping things that look more like dragonflies than butterflies. They never seem to get cold, don't shiver or shake or get soggy like

Wrangler photo
October 7, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Wrangler

Dave Housley

“I thought you were going to play football,” she says.

“Yeah,” I say.

“You’re wearing jeans.”

“Yes.”

She is folding laundry, matching socks. She rolls a pair into a neat ball and

Coors Light photo
September 30, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Coors Light

Dave Housley

It is noon. Very hot. The Denver sun’s pitiless spotlight pushes down upon pedestrians carrying briefcases or carryout lunches. Like ants under a child’s magnifying glass, they skitter along the

Cialis photo
September 23, 2012 | Commercial Fiction

Cialis

Dave Housley

How he got the resort people to put these tubs out here, I have no idea.

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Elizabeth Ellen

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Legs Get Led Astray

Chloe Caldwell

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Elizabeth Ellen

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