March '04

Derek Murphy Ultimate Fearless
David Gianatasio Smile
Savannah Schroll Showmanship
Dianne McKnight How To Train Mules
John Leafey The Field

Come on, you can do it.

...please...

A big smile. For the camera. Just look at the little red light.

...phone...

Yes, I see the phone on the table. But look over here.

...you've got to call for help...

Smile!

...for God's sake!..

Who slit his wrists, hmm?

...it was a mistake...

I don't see how. You went into the bathroom and took the razor and cut up your wrists. Isn't that right?

...yes, but...

So, you wanted to kill yourself. That was your intention.

...but I...

So, it looks like you're going to succeed.

...changed my mind...

Kind of late for that now.

...you could call...

Now look, you've made a mess of everything else in your life. That's what you're always saying. You've been out of work for a year. You told me just yesterday that your writing's going badly, that you haven't been able to concentrate since Jen moved out, that you lie around all day. Didn't you say you'd be better off dead?

...that was before...

Before what?

...changed my mind...

I don't think you're going to make it to the phone.

...you...sick...bastard...

Nobody's going to believe this footage! Do you think I could get in trouble? Seems like it might be illegal or something.

...can't...can't...

I'm surprised you're still conscious. You've lost so much blood. God, your security deposit'll never cover the mess in that bathroom.

...want...to...live...

There you go. You can never make up your mind. Never pick a course of action and stick to it. That's your problem. Indecision. What you've got to do is focus on a goal. But I guess that wouldn't help you much now...

FORCHRISSAKEYOUBASTARDGETMESOMEHELP!

I know how it is. I was just like you. Depressed, drifting, hanging out and getting high. But that's all behind me now. What have I always wanted to do? Make movies! Now I've got a goal. That's why I'm applying to film school. And wouldn't you know, the very day I shell out for this camera, I come next door to show it off an here you are, like this! The movie of a lifetime!

RIIIIIIING!

Oh my god! Right on cue!

RIIIIIIING!

What footage -- this is amazing. How many rings until your machine picks up?

RIIIIIIING!

Hey, I think it's stopped.

... ... ...

What was that? Your lips moved but there wasn't any sound. It's okay that you're not smiling. You look more natural that way. I mean, you really look dead.